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lyrics

Gave a nephew's girlfriend a kiss on the mouth
Gave a daughter's boyfriend a tug-job
Met a cousin's partner behind the garage
Installed a new glory hole for grandpa
Pole could use a buffing
Didn't make me a fool for nothing
Hose could use a scrubbing
Didn't make me a fool for nothing
Open bottle of bleach in the doghouse
Eviscerated in front of my parents
Eviscerated in front of my boss
Eviscerated in front of my allies
Eviscerated in front of the judge
Gave a niece's husband a kiss on the mouth
Gave a son's estranged wife a rimjob
Found a cousin's partner under the Thanksgiving table
Found a brother bare-assed and choked by a cable
Pole could use a rubbing
Didn't make me a fool for nothing
Hose could use some loving
Didn't make me a fool for nothing
Discovered shards of glass in the litter box
Eviscerated in front of my parents
Eviscerated in front of my boss
Eviscerated in front of my allies
Eviscerated in front of the judge
Hold your best friend's paw as he passes on
Crawled up Kropotkin's beard and now he's gone

credits

from Dispatches From the Land of Wheat and Divorce, released October 25, 2016

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all rights reserved

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